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Post by smsmith on Jun 25, 2022 17:57:30 GMT -6
Should be a good thread
Nope, I have zero interest in getting a divorce. But...a young guy we know is likely on his way to getting one. I told him he was making a mistake a year ago or so, but she was still making it worth his while to go ahead with the deal. She's 21, he's damn near 30.
Should he consult with every divorce attorney in the area to insure she can't because of conflict of interest? Can a person "hide" investments (guessing not)?
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Post by Reagan on Jun 25, 2022 21:12:09 GMT -6
At times I’m interested.
Can’t offer advice but I’ll be following.
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ruttin1
Full Member
Posts: 128
Likes: 201
Location: Shawano Co, WI
Zone: 4B
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Post by ruttin1 on Jun 26, 2022 2:51:50 GMT -6
Does he have a trusted relative he could start funneling cash to? Anything in his name I think a good lawyer would find, but if he can hide it with a relative….. Not an attorney, never been divorced but I’ve heard.
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Post by wklman on Jun 26, 2022 3:27:56 GMT -6
All depends on the attorney she has and what she wants. A good one will gut the guy. If she knows about it it'll be hard to withhold much. Things to keep in mind are 401k's and pensions. Have him pay her off if he can with stuff like that. Over time that stuff will add up and hammer him in the future.
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Post by Tooln on Jun 26, 2022 6:23:50 GMT -6
Money can be tracked. But if a guy has a habit of doing a lot of spending on booze or gambling thats hard to track. Just hide the cash and say it was spent on booze, and gambling. I hope there are no kids involved.
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Post by nhmountains on Jun 26, 2022 6:38:33 GMT -6
Having gone through this last year with my 93 year old father in-law I’d be looking at what assets and liabilities are in both their names and what are not. Get joint credit cards paid off and canceled. If Minnesota is a equitable distribution state then any assets they accrued during the marriage will be equitably split. Assets in each of their names prior to marriage that weren’t changed to joint will stay with them. Pension split would be what they each gained during the marriage so if he added $2000 then she would get half that. Vice versa.
It’s good they are figuring this out now. Rather then 10 years later. The sooner he gets it done the better. He might want to stop adding to the 401k until this is over and use that money up ( or hide it) until it’s over. It could be over quickly if he or she don’t get greedy.
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Post by caveman on Jun 26, 2022 9:21:14 GMT -6
If there are any kids put them first.
If you are not trying to do everything for the kids, really look closely in the mirror about the divorce.
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Post by smsmith on Jun 26, 2022 9:27:26 GMT -6
The couple doesn't have kids, thankfully.
I hope the two of them don't just quit on the marriage, but my guess is that is exactly what they'll do. Neither were raised in homes with successful marriages. They have never seen how it's supposed to work...
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Post by nhmountains on Jun 26, 2022 12:40:42 GMT -6
The couple doesn't have kids, thankfully. I hope the two of them don't just quit on the marriage, but my guess is that is exactly what they'll do. Neither were raised in homes with successful marriages. They have never seen how it's supposed to work... On the other hand my 94 year old FIL should have divorced within the first year and spent 11+ years of torture married to the old hag that tormented him every day. He wasted 11 years of his life that he’s finally realizing he will never get back. Everything that they both feared in divorcing happened but, they could’ve both moved on 11 years earlier.
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Post by nhmountains on Jun 26, 2022 12:49:21 GMT -6
The couple doesn't have kids, thankfully. I hope the two of them don't just quit on the marriage, but my guess is that is exactly what they'll do. Neither were raised in homes with successful marriages. They have never seen how it's supposed to work... I’d agree with the kids thing to a certain extent but, what I saw with my ex stepmother in-law’s kids I wouldn’t agree. They never once visited her in the 11 years they were married. They were waiting for her to die to get her inheritance. The one daughter she trusted sent her immediately into an assisted memory care unit at a nursing home once she touched down in Minnesota. She thought she was moving in with her daughter. Her kids deserved to deal with their mother and wouldn’t step up to the plate when they had the option. So I hope she lives a long time so that the nursing home eats up every cent of their inheritance. My wife and I dealt with her for 11 years and we never got one thank you from her kids.
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Post by buckvelvet on Jul 5, 2022 7:19:33 GMT -6
Yeah, thankfully no kids, Been there, done that, I don't suggest that shit to anyone.
For sanity's sake I hope they can work out whatever the differences are, really it just takes 2 sane people to sit down and talk, even if you need a counselor. Sadly generally divorces are because at least 1 side is completely unreasonable or unhinged.
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Post by MoBuckChaser on Jul 6, 2022 18:09:42 GMT -6
With the shit I have done over the last 40 years she has had to put up with, I already sleep with one eye open. If I ever thought of the word divorce after all that I wouldn’t be long for the world.
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Post by chummer16 on Jul 6, 2022 18:34:48 GMT -6
I have had two friends get divorced. First one was really ugly. She took him to the cleaners despite making as much money as him. He kind of deserved it. Our second friend wanted a divorce so bad but didn’t want to pay her. They really hated each other. He was going to ride it out for 8 years until the youngest was in college. It was going to cost him 150k to walk away. When he asked our first buddy for advice I thought he nailed it. He said paying her sucks but if you went in front of a judge tomorrow for sentencing and he offered you 8 years in jail or pay 150k and walk away what would you do? He paid the money.
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Post by MoBuckChaser on Jul 10, 2022 18:43:10 GMT -6
Customer of mine got divorced 3 years ago after 18 years of marriage. He had one kid and swears it was the only time they had sex during the marriage. The day his boy turned 18 and just started college, he told the wife to get the fuck out. Took all her shit and threw outside. She said she was stunned, but after sleeping in separate beds for 18 years and constant verbal abuse from her, he said she had it coming. He now has a sex addict cleaning lady that moved in and said he is making up for lost time. He had to re mortgage the farm and give her half his pension but said it was all worth it.
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Post by buckvelvet on Jul 11, 2022 6:38:02 GMT -6
Customer of mine got divorced 3 years ago after 18 years of marriage. He had one kid and swears it was the only time they had sex during the marriage. The day his boy turned 18 and just started college, he told the wife to get the fuck out. Took all her shit and threw outside. She said she was stunned, but after sleeping in separate beds for 18 years and constant verbal abuse from her, he said she had it coming. He now has a sex addict cleaning lady that moved in and said he is making up for lost time. He had to re mortgage the farm and give her half his pension but said it was all worth it. That right there is no way to live, good for him.
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